Which Is Worse

The Seventh Grade girls and guys were just hanging out as friends, when one of them, a girl named Cindy complained that she was on her period.  Joe said that must be awful, what does a period feel like?  Cindy said that it is not a great feeling and then she looked at Joe and asked him if he was getting a boner.  Joe covered up his crotch area with his hands and he said, “If you think it is bad to get your period, then you should try holding your boner down in public, so that no one can see it.”  The discussion was on, which is worse?

Delores said, “A period is way so much worse, though I’ve never had a boner, however my boyfriend gets them all of the time.  I just had my period and my cramps were so horrible that even after taking pain killers I was shaking (and almost crying) in pain and I just about threw up because the pain was so bad.  All that chemical and hormonal imbalance, can really do a job on any woman.”

Debbie chimed in, “When you’re on your period you bloat, shit like crazy, get hot flashes, cramps, your breasts ache, and the tiniest sneeze shoots a waterfall of blood out of your body.  Not only does it last 5 days (a week to nine days for some), but it comes back every single month until you’re like 50 (or older at least that is what I was told).”

Eleanor said, “A boner should be pretty easier to hide, as guys can just wear a jacket or position themselves to obscure it from view.  I would be willing to bet that most of the girls can’t even spot a boner, I mean as long as the guy is wearing clothes.  I bet it would be embarrassing if everyone could see a guy’s boner sticking out, but boners don’t come with all of the problems involved in periods.”

Alice said, “Being on your period is worse than having a boner.  Boners don’t last for a week and I’ve never seen a guy cry out in pain just because he has a boner.  You don’t get a headache from having a boner, and you don’t get back pains or stomach pains either.  You don’t have to throw up and you don’t get random stupid cravings (excluding thoughts of having sex) when you have a boner.  I guess you would get embarrassed which could make you sad if someone notices it, but I have never heard of a boner leading to depression or suicide.”

Clifford said, “Guys get turned on all the time and that makes it stick out, however my boners usually only last for about 10 minutes tops, and a girls period can last for 7 days so that is probably much worse.”

Betty said, “My periods feel like cat claws ripping into the sides of my uterus and I have a constant stomach cramp that feels like a really bad stomach ache and I get this constant contracting down below, which makes me bloat and all of those hormonal changes make me get short tempered and angry.”

Mathew said, “My boners usually last much longer than ten minutes, although I have never actually timed any of them.  I get them several times a day and I get them every day.  On an average day I will get anywhere from 8-24 boners a day and that is everyday out of the month.  There is no real pain associated with them, but the embarrassment goes far beyond that of a woman’s menstrual cycle.  I had one the other day when my mom walked into my room and she told me to stand up when she was talking to me and I pointed at my predicament and I had to tell her that I couldn’t, it was so embarrassing.”

Sally said, “Honestly, you even compare the two!  My period means pain, discomfort, attitude changes, a possibility of getting stained underwear, and this awkwardness because I just don’t want to move or do anything.  I’m sleepy all the time and I just want to lay down.  Tons of blood, constant trips to the bathroom, having to change my pad and get clean all the time.  The list goes on, and your boner is about being pleasured, where my period is all about pain.  My period starts with ruining my panties because its random and it happens when I am not prepared.  I have ruined so many pairs of cute expensive panties.  I have gotten stains on my pants and even on my bed sheets.  Then there’s that bad cramp that I get in my lower back that is always there, but it gets really intense and it comes in waves.  I have to change my pad all the time and its gross, I feel horrible, and unclean.  It smells gross.  I have no appetite, I get light headed, I fainted once, and occasionally I get a bout of diarrhea.”

Leo said, “That was way TMI!  Boners are not all that bad, as eventually guys learn to control themselves and not let every little thing turn them on. Girls are not able to control a period, even if they tried without getting their uterus taken out or taking some pill and I heard that sometime that pill doesn’t even work.  65% of the time boners occur for no reason and it is evident when it happens and you can’t change human nature.”

Tony said, “I think that girls should be strong enough to survive their periods, as others have been doing it for centuries.  It is not really our faults when every little thing turns us on, and it is not an easy thing to try to control a boner.”

Tammy said, “I don’t like having to wear a tampon or a pad and the hormones always makes me crazy.  And there is so much more embarrassment if the blood soaks through my clothes and everyone can see the blood on my ass.  I get randomly super turned on before and after my period ends.  The only cure that works for me is to think about naked grandmas and dead cats, but when my PMS Post Menstrual Syndrome kicks in, my emotions are amplified.”

Tom said, “Many guys become paranoid because they think that their boner might be really obvious to everyone.  They don’t think correctly when all of their blood has gone from their brain right into their boner.  Sometimes there is no way for them to hide it, which is always embarrassing.  It doesn’t really hurt unless it gets to be 100% hard and you can’t make it go away.  You have all seen those commercials about Viagra, Cialis and Levitra warning against getting an erection that lasts for more than four hours and I have never heard of a warning about a period lasting more than four hours.  It would be would be a pretty gay if I saw a guy was looking at my boner, but if it was a girl, I guess I would take that as a compliment.  I try not to make my boners look obvious to anyone, as they are a private thing for me.”

Joe said, “Women are so much better with pain than men are, all that going through Child Birth and Periods, at the end of the day, a women’s life can be agonizing and painful.  A boner is very embarrassing to boys and a period is also embarrassing to girls as well, but after a while everyone learns to live with it.  Women need to quit bitching about their periods, and I am real tired of listening to them constantly complaining about how difficult it is to just be a woman.  The big difference is how society views periods and an erection, as unlike the menstrual cycle, erections are not accepted.  If a guy sees a girl sitting in front of him in class and her skirt is riding all the way up so it reveals her smooth, soft, pink, satin panties, he will most often get a raging erection.  If it tents out in the front of your slacks, it could be dangerous and poke out somebody’s eye, although I have never seen that happen.  Girls get a month of advanced warning where as erections are unpreventable, they are fairly uncomfortable when our stuff rises up and starts to stick out.  We need to adjust, and then we have to try and hide what is going on.  Unwanted erections can destroy a guy’s self esteem and make everyone think that he is a pervert.  When a guy starts pointing outward, there is no room for that thing to grow, so it may hurt and nobody makes Advil or Midol for an erection.  The timing for erections is the worst, as they often come (no pun intended) when they are not wanted and at least girls get some type of warning.”  Cindy said, “Joe I see you still have that boner.”

Written for 12/2/17 Linda G. Hill’s ‘Life in progress’ Stream of Consciousness Saturday where the prompt is cramp.