Panties

In some countries, the word ”PANT” is used to mean underwear.  Both sexes will wear a pant, however this term is more regularly used for undergarments wore by women.  Girls wear panties mainly because they saw their parent wearing them, and even in this modern age, there are some primitive villages where women will just wear pant and go around with their bare breasts showing.  Without the pant, women in this world are not complete.  Eve started wearing panties to cover up her naked body and this tradition has been passed down from generation to generation.  Every self respected lady will cover their heavenly route.

Most young ladies experience a certain time of the month when they are on their period and the panty will support their ‘Pad’ that they use to restrict their flow.  Panties are worn for disease prevention, to prevent any unwanted micro organisms from getting into a healthy vagina.  A man is likely to have more respect for a woman if she is wearing panties.  Women enjoy wearing sexy underwear for themselves and their husbands, because it is a simple way to get a boost.

Regional differences turn underpants into pants, and pants are trousers, so this can be confusing at times. Panties are often referred to as knickers and pants can refer to trousers, jeans, slacks, shorts, sweatpants, parachute pants or whatever.  The term underpants clearly means that they should go under your pants. When the word pant is used for underwear, it can cause a different perception of what is being worn.

There are many different kinds of Pant, like the bikini, boyshorts, brief, cheeky, G-String, high waist, hipster, retro, slip, tanga and the thong.  The bikini features narrow sides and a hip-level waistband which gives this panty a classic, universally flattering shape that’s essential for every wardrobe.  The bikini panty could be ideal for working out, because they’ll move with you, instead of fighting off thong chafing, you can focus on getting fit.  The boyshort is a cheeky take on fitted boxer shorts, and these panties deliver a body-hugging fit with a longer leg for extra coverage under skirts and dresses.  The brief is a classic comfort panty, that have a higher rise and provide excellent seat coverage.  The cheeky may also be called a Brazilian and it is similar to a bikini with a more exposed back.  The cheeky thong covers a little bit of your cheeks, but isn’t a full-on bikini fit, so it may be perfect to wear with jeans, because you won’t get a strong panty line and you have a little more coverage on your lady parts from bulky jean seams.

The G-String will give you the least coverage, but it will give you a smoother silhouette under tight dresses and pants.  They have string sides and a string back, which will put the spotlight on your buns.  The high-cut panty gives your legs a long, lean look while also offering moderate to full coverage in back.  The hipster is an everyday favorite, because it features a low-rise panty with wider sides that provide minimal to moderate coverage.  It’s a hybrid between a boyshort and bikini cut.  Retro panties are vintage style panties and they may be called granny panties, because they are high rise panties and they give you full coverage on the rear.  Slip panties are long-length, seam free underwear which provide smoothing coverage and helps prevent panty lines.  They are usually made from a silky-soft microfiber fabric that creates a lightweight, sleek design without constriction to help you conquer the day with comfortable coverage and without constriction.

A tanga is a pair of briefs consisting of small panels connected by strings at the sides.  Thongs flaunt revealing coverage in back and body-hugging fabrics for a smooth, line-free look that works great under form-fitting clothes.  Thongs aren’t just little stringy things anymore.  They have a skinnier waistband with minimal coverage on back side, but recently lingerie designers have made the bands at the hip wider and more comfortable on your curves.  Thongs allow you to say goodbye to visible panty lines without having to sacrifice any comfort.

This was written for Linda G. Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday where the prompt word is “pant”.

Game Tosser

There are some common guessing games that have actually been around in some form or another for hundreds of years, which are still able to rope people in today.  The lesson for all gamblers to learn is that when something seems to be too good to be true, it probably isn’t.  Nobody is giving away money for free, as the house always has an edge and in these particular games, the edge is massive.  Both three card monte and the shell games are based on the same basic idea, you need to keep your eye on the target, while the dealer or operator of these games who is called the tosser (or the scammer) mixes it up to the best of their abilities and then you make your best guess.  Both of these games work on the principle of building up someone’s confidence till they get hooked and start betting money.

In three card monte, the tosser uses playing cards, which might be a red queen and two black cards or it could be two black fours and a red ace.  It really does not matter as long as one card is remarkably different from the other two.  The cards need to bend lengthwise with a crease down the middle, to make it easier for the tosser to handle them.  The basic premise behind this game is that once the three cards are shuffled and sitting on the table, then the mark or sucker will try to pick the odd card, in this case, the red one.

The tosser shows the player all three cards, face-up, and then drops them face down on a table.  They slide the cards around on the table, switching their positions rapidly.  The player tries to track the position of the money card as the tosser moves it around.  When the tosser stops, the player makes a bet and guesses the position of the red card.  In most games, the sucker bets money on whatever card they think is the money card, they usually lose, and then the tosser takes their money.  The tosser is a magician, who takes great pains to take money from the sucker while not making them feel stupid for failing to follow the red card.

The tosser is an expert at leading the player away from the money card and this is usually done in the beginning of the game.  In order for the player to think that the game is fair, the tosser shows all three cards, they hold a black card in one hand and a black card and the red card in the other hand.  This black card is held between the thumb and middle finger, and the red card is held in front of it, between the thumb and the ring finger.  Since the red is in front, the player assumes the tosser drops it first, but in fact, the tosser releases the black card first, while moving their hand to the side.  This moves the money card out of the way, so the black card can fall straight down.  The tosser does this so quickly that the spectators never notice, and just about everyone is tracking the wrong card.

In the shell game, the tosser lays three half shells, or cups, or open match boxes face down on the table and slips a ball or pea underneath one.  Then the tosser slides the shells around while the player tries to track the shell with the pea.  Then the audience bets which shell they think the little ball is under.  The shell game is portrayed as a gambling game, but in reality, when a wager for money is made, it is almost always a confidence trick used to perpetrate fraud, because usually there is no way to win these games.  In many shell games, the ball isn’t under any of the shells, as the tosser has pinched it in their hand right off the table!  There are a few different ways of doing this, as the tosser may lift the shell as it slides over the edge of a table cloth or newspaper sheet.  When the ball rolls out from under a shell, the tosser keeps shuffling and most people have no idea that there is no winning shell.

In most cases, this sleight of hand (also known as prestidigitation or legerdemain which refers to fine motor skills when used by performing artists in different art forms to entertain or manipulate) is actually the simplest part of the scam.  Most card and shell games are very elaborate operations involving several crew members.  In addition to the tosser, the scam depends on a lookout to keep an eye out for the police, a roper to bring in potential players and one or more shills to get people to play.  The shill blends in as part of the crowd trying to act as a player or an involved spectator.

When the dealer moves the shells, they usually lift them up just a bit so that the mark will actually get to see the ball a few times during the shuffle.  The mark does not realize that the dealer actually removes the ball on his last shuffle move.  The tosser has probably put hundreds and hundreds of hours practicing to do that in a very unnoticeable way.  His crew of accomplices are responsible for blocking all the positions where you could see the removal being done.  They also stand around and cheer to create enthusiasm which makes the game more appealing to outsiders.  Sometimes they play and win and get money from the dealer showing that there is a legitimate possibility of wining this game or they even might lose but they are all working together with the same money.  The outsider must think that the only reason they lost was because they chose the wrong box.

You can’t beat this game, because even if you see the card switch, track the right shell and put down money on the red card or the shell with the ball, one of the shills will just put down a higher bet on another card, and the tosser will decree ‘one bet at a time’.  A shill might even bump into the table, accidentally knocking it over, voiding the game.  Or the tosser might suddenly spot the police, and pack the game up.  It is a scam where everyone is only out to take your money, even if you are a great guesser.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt word from Linda G. Hill is ‘guess’.
Stream of Consciousness Saturday

Move the World

A seesaw (also known as a teeter-totter) is a long, narrow board supported by a single pivot point, most commonly located at the midpoint between both ends; as one end goes up, the other goes down.  The seesaw is common on most playgrounds and they all feature a board which is balanced in the center.  A person sits on each end, and they take turns pushing their feet against the ground to lift their side into the air.  As one person goes up another person goes down.  The Greek Archimedes was speaking metaphorically when he said, ‘Give me a lever long enough and a fulcrum on which to place it, and I shall move the world’ because a long lever would reduce the amount of energy needed to lift an object.

Archimedes’ Law of the Lever, involves a statement about balancing a beam with different weights distributed along its length, and this is a classical example of a problem drawn from and applied in, the physical world, but which is most illuminated when treated in abstract mathematical terms.  Following in the footsteps of Euclid, Archimedes sets up a few axioms which are simple abstractions of the everyday experience and from which he proceeds to derive step-by-step the less obvious properties.

I wonder, how long a lever would need to be on Earth, to be able to lift a sphere with the mass of Earth, if a human of average size were to sit on the other side of the lever?  Since the mass of Earth is 6×10 to the 24 power kg, and if Archimedes can lift 60 kg, he would need a lever with an arm ratio of 10 to the 23 power to 1.  So if the short arm is one meter long, the lever length will be 10 to the 23 power meters plus one or 10 to the 24 power meters in length.  We must also note that Archimedes would have to push the lever for 10 to the 24 power meters to shift the Earth just by one millimeter.  With the length of the lever, being 10 to the 24 power meters which is the equivalent of 10 million light years, that is one damn long lever.  The Andromeda Galaxy is the nearest spiral galaxy to the Milky Way and that is approximately 2.5 million light-years away, so that would only be one quarter of the distance needed.  If Archimedes were to push the lever for 10 to the 24 power meters at the speed of light, it would take him 10 thousand years to move the Earth.  Another quandary, technically any leaver that lifts an object away from the Earth also lifts the Earth away from said object.  Maybe one meter for the short arm is too long, as all Archimedes said was the he could move the Earth, he did not say how far.  If Archimedes could move the Earth the equivalent of an electron, it would still be moved.

For Linda G Hills Stream of Consciousness Saturday
The prompt is High/Low.

A Wicked Slice

Henry had a steady job working as a caddy at a prestigious world-renowned country club which is steeped in tradition and history and he usually did two loops every day.  A loop involves carrying two golf bags around for 18 holes.  It was a good job for staying in shape, especially climbing up all of those hills at the country club, but whenever Henry was not carrying golf bags, he was at the tavern drinking, so overall he was not in that great of shape.  During the week most of the members had jobs, so they could not get out to play golf as often as they wanted, but there were some older gentlemen who took out the time to play every day.  These old farts were not great golfers and in fact they were nothing but crotchety old fuckers, but Henry had a steady loop with them playing in the afternoons and this way he was always able to caddy two times per day.  Golfers are strange creatures with all the bets that they make and after the beer starts flowing they usually just get weirder.  They have to maintain a certain etiquette and there are a ton of rules that they are required to follow, in fact, there are so many official rules to this game, most average players do not know all of them.  Henry knew all the rules and this made him popular with almost every member.

Milton Mulligan always arrived late to the golf course, he never took the time to stretch or loosen up, basically because he was just damn lazy.  When he got to the course he was stiff, so much so that he always messed up his first tee shot and then he would complain that he wanted a do-over.  To stop his bitching, the other golfers knew that they would have to grant him a second chance to remedy his blunder. Every time these gentlemen played together, they allowed Mulligan to replay his tee shot on the first hole without charging him a penalty stroke, and eventually they named this shot the mulligan.

This was an elite country club and because of this women were not allowed on the course till the afternoon.  The caddy master was responsible for keeping the women from playing in the mornings and this worked out well for Derrick Johnson who was an afternoon player and he also had a shot named after him.  At most other golf courses this shot is called the Dick Out, but here it was always referred to as the johnson, because he had done this so often.  Guys will be guys and they like to play odd games and tease each other about male prowess, especially when it comes to hitting a golf ball a long distance and you might hear someone say, ‘You are a long dude, like huge!’  There is an unwritten rule, that was more like a custom, which stated that if a male player fails to make it past the ladies tee off area with their drive, than that player must open his fly and play their way up to the green with his male appendage hanging out of his pants in full view of the other golfers, to prove that they are not a woman.  When ladies were on the course this custom was not followed, so there would be no johnson shots.

Kelly Gallagher used to tee them high and let them fly, but he had this awful habit of hitting beneath the ball which caused it to go high up in the air, but it did not travel very far in distance.  This shot is referred to as a giraffe’s ass, because it is high and stinky, but here it was called the gallagher.  The last player in this foursome was named Benjamin Buchannan and his nickname was Bucky and he had a wicked slice.  Now I have to describe what a slice is.

Before I can explain the slice to you, I need to discuss the difference between right handed and left handed golfers.  In my opinion left handed golfers have no reason to play this game, but since they do make left handed clubs and there are left handed golfers, you need to understand this oddity.  Baseball has switch hitters, but in golf, people either stand on the left side of the ball or on the right side of the ball.  The reason I dislike lefties is that I used to be a caddy and you get so used to walking up to the ball and placing the bag down on the right side of it, so the golfer can select their club, but this is all bass-ackwards when you have to caddy for a leftie.  I think that the Tower of Babel may have been built by some left handed construction workers and that is why it collapsed.  I’m not exactly sure who the first person was that did something backwards, but I wish I could strangle him.  I understand that left handed persons are born that way and holding a bias against lefties is unfair, but they should go bowling or fishing and not play golf.  I am done with lefties now, so everything else will be related to righties or normal golfers.

Most golfers don’t hit straight shots down the middle of the fairway all that often, even professionals stray into the rough.  A straight shot does not curve to the right or the left and the shot that curves to the left is called a hook, while a shot that curves to the right is termed a slice.  There may be times when you want to hit a slice or hook shot, perhaps to get around a tree or avoid some other obstacle.  A little slice is called a fade, and a little hook is called a draw.

Being the steady caddy for the old timers for so many years, Henry knew exactly what to expect from them.  The four old coots always played together and they had the same tee time and depending on how hot the day got, they would either all walk, which would mean that another double caddy would join Henry, or they world all ride golf carts, requiring Henry to carry their putters and tend all the pins.  These guys were all very well off and the average age among them was probably about 90.  They all had outlived all of their wives and they each had young Asian housekeepers to take care of their needs.

One afternoon, the oldest golfer Bucky, who was also the worst player in this group, sliced his ball into the woods and he looked at Henry and said, ‘What happens now?’  Henry was irritated and he barked back, ‘You have been playing this game since before I was born and you know the rules and the penalties that are incurred.  The lost ball rule allows you or I should say me, 5 minutes to search for your ball.  If I am able to locate your ball, then you can play it where it lies or you can declare your ball to be unplayable and that will cost you a penalty stroke and you would be able to drop your ball within two club lengths of where the ball lies, no closer to the hole.

Since you clearly did not hit it into a water hazard and there are no stakes indicating that this is marked as being out of bounds, and subsequently if I don’t find your ball in the allotted time period, you must play another ball from the spot where your last shot was played, incurring a penalty of one stroke, and of course the loss of distance.  You can hit a provisional ball from here lying two on the tee and three after you hit it which will save all of us from having to look for your ball in the woods.  There is one other option that you may choose which of course will also cost you a one stroke penalty, and that is to draw a line from the hole to where the ball is located and drop anywhere behind that point, keeping the point between you and the hole.’  Bucky banged his driver on his golf bag and said, ‘Cigar.’ Henry knew this was his signal to fish a cigar out of his bag and help him light it.

The cart girl came by and everyone got refreshments and Henry said, ‘Hit your provisional shot and then when we walk up to your ball, we can try and find the one that you hit into the woods, but there are a lot of creepy things in there like snakes and such, so I am not going to look too long.  I actually think that this is the exact spot where some golfer last week was looking for his ball and he found a decapitated head.  How creepy is that, just a head, no body and not even a limb.’

For Linda G. Hill Stream of Consciousness Saturday