Step Back Jack

Rocky the squirrel told the intruder not to come one step closer, or else they would regret it.  Rocky went on to say, “If you choose to come closer, I won’t have any choice and I will have to fight you, and if you have ever been scratched by a squirrel before, you will know that this can be a very unpleasant experience.  You may think that I am a tiny creature, but I have long sharp teeth and claws, so this probably won’t end well for you.  I am certain to leave you with a very deep and painful cut, and there is a good chance that I am carrying some type of nasty disease that you don’t want.  When I am feeling threatened, I will scratch your eyes out, and that won’t be a good look on you.”

Written for Stine Writing – Poetry, Positivity, and Connecting!, Simply 6 Minutes hosted by Christine Bialczak.

Flattened Like a Pancake

Two hundred miles off the coast of Yemen is the remote island of Socotra, where this umbrella-like otherworldly tree known as dragon’s blood tree is found.  Pliny wrote about dragons inhabiting this island where the trees yielded red drops of cinnabar fungus, which was carved into jewelry and ornaments.  Researchers have been trying for centuries to solve the mystery about the origins of the dragon’s blood, whether it came from the tree, or was a mineral from the earth.  There is also an Indian legend about a fierce battle, where a dragon (or possibly a Makara which is a legendary sea dragon) bit an elephant and drank its blood.  When the elephant fell to the ground, it crushed the dragon, turning the dragon into a pancake, while mixing the blood of both creatures to yield a resin-like substance and that red sap spewed out from the tree that grew there.  The resin is believed to have magical and medicinal properties and people still use it as a pigment for art, and as a dye.  Others have found therapeutic medical uses for the sap dripping from the dragon’s blood tree and it supposedly makes a good antidiarrhetic, that reduces production of stress hormones and increase the production of hormones or chemicals that makes one feel calm and happy.

Written for Stine Writing – Poetry, Positivity, and Connecting!, Simply 6 Minutes hosted by Christine Bialczak.

The Crooked Forest

No one truly knows why these trees are bent the way that they are, but I have a theory.  The trunk curvature is a result of a storm that blew through this forest just after they were planted, and they started growing sideways for an extended period of time while they were still saplings.  Eventually they straightened out reaching for the sunlight, but they are permanently off kilter.  This uniform curvature has affected about 90 trees, and it is the result a small tornado that touched down almost 100 years ago.  Some people say that aliens are responsible for the odd shape and others say that they were bent out of shape from heavy snow, but I am sticking with my theory.

Written for Stine Writing – Poetry, Positivity, and Connecting!, Simply 6 Minutes hosted by Christine Bialczak.

Cover the Plants

When Alexa alerted me about the wind chill that we were going to get tonight, I went out and put these cute looking sock puppets on the snapdragons.  They are hardy plants, but they need a little help from me when temperatures drop below the freezing mark.  Snapdragons are classified as tender perennials when they are in mild climates, which is what we have here in Florida.  When they are planted outdoors, they must be kept warm to help them survive cold weather, and this can be done by placing fabric over the plants.  I love my snapdragons and I think that they are well worth the special care that they need.  Look how cute they look in the alien outfits that I made for them!  When they are all dressed up for the cold snap, I usually sing that Elvis song ‘Love Me Tender’ to them.

Written for Stine Writing – Poetry, Positivity, and Connecting!, Simply 6 Minutes hosted by Christine Bialczak.

You Don’t See Many of These

The redicuceros is basically a rhinoceros with a chicken like head and they are very timid creatures that try to avoid contact with humanoids.  Instead of having the horn on the upper surface of their snout, they have an upright comb like that of a chicken.  The comb acts like the radiator of a car, helping to cool the redicuceros off from the desert heat.  Blood circulates through the comb’s large surface area to release heat.  The comb also has some sex appeal for other redicuceros.  It is thought the redicuceros is a new animal that evolved due to climate change.  This animal has a beak shaped mouth, which it uses to catch and hold its food.  Under its beak are two fleshy lobes or flaps of skin, called waddles, and one hangs on each side.  These waddles are also part of the animal’s cooling system.  Scientists feel that this natural form of evolution happened, due to all of the marshes drying up lately and since the rhinoceros lacks sweat glands that would help them cool off, these new features developed to help them survive on this sweltering planet.  The people that first discovered these creatures felt that they looked ridiculous, and that is how they got their name.

Written for Stine Writing – Poetry, Positivity, and Connecting!, Simply 6 Minutes hosted by Christine Bialczak.

Quitting Today

Granny said, “I know that I promised that I would quit smoking when I reached 100, but I figure that since I didn’t have my cake yet, that I could enjoy one more cigarette.  I started smoking in 1930 when I was 8 years old, and it hasn’t killed me yet.  I was not able to legally purchase tobacco at that time, but I used to filch, pilfer, or steal some from my parents, when they weren’t looking.  They smoked Luckies and I made some Lucky Strikes on their packs of cigarettes.”  I laughed and wished her a happy birthday.

Written for Stine Writing – Poetry, Positivity, and Connecting!, Simply 6 Minutes hosted by Christine Bialczak.

Immersive Art

I got paid in peanuts to become this innovative and exploratory in nature form of art, but I happen to like peanuts.  The artist has this thing for butterflies, and he said that it will probably wash off in a week, so I said what the hell and went along with it.  I am getting kind of old now and my skin is all wrinkled, but with these colorful ears, nobody is looking at my wrinkles anymore.  I am thinking that if I flap my ears fast enough that I might be able to fly.  My body is relatively aerodynamic for that of a land animal, but if I did start flying around, they would probably put me in a circus.  I weigh a heck of a lot more than any bird, and although my body has adapted to my weight, my ears would have to be a whole lot bigger for me to start flying with them.

Written for Stine Writing – Poetry, Positivity, and Connecting!, Simply 6 Minutes hosted by Christine Bialczak.

Hybrid

After successfully crossbreeding a male zebra with a female horse and creating a zorse, zebrose, zebrula, or a zebrule, Doctor Chester Bunting decided he would try crossbreeding a female zebra with a male horse and he was successful in creating a hebra, horsebra, zebret, zebrinny, or zebra hinny, whatever you want to call it.   Then he moved on to the zony, crossbreeding a zebra with a pony.  His next logical step was working with a zebra and a donkey to create the zenkey, zonkey, zebrass, or as some folks like to call it a zedonk.  Doctor Chester Bunting loved zebras, but he thought that maybe he could crossbreed them outside the equine family and he wondered what would happen if he tried to use a dog.  Doctor Bunting figured that he could make the perfect designer dog breed, if he were able to find animals that shared enough genetic materials.

Written for Stine Writing – Poetry, Positivity, and Connecting!, Simply 6 Minutes hosted by Christine Bialczak.

Disappointing

She was not all that she was cracked up to be and she certainly didn’t live up to the reputation that I expected of her, based on what others had told me.  She looked great and it would have been nice to get a hug or a kiss, instead of a handshake, so I was kind of putting my hand out, while at the same time keeping my arms open for the hug as I waited for her to approach me on our first date.  I realized right away that this was a mistake, as she kept checking her cell phone under the table, which made me feel like she didn’t want to be here with me.  What goes on inside the mind of a woman has always been a mystery to me.  If she wasn’t interested in dating, she could have said so, before we reached this awkward point.

I tried to be confident, being the manly man that I am, one who knows what he wants and isn’t afraid to go for it, but her condescending attitude was making me feel desperate, and needy, like a man who can’t take a hint.  When I go on a date with a new person, I try to keep my hopes up, so I can enjoy spending time with them and possibly getting the chance to know them.  I could sense right off that she had zero interest in being with me and that she was not just playing hard to get.  I told her that dating is confusing enough without having to play these stupid games, so I said that we should be real with each other.  I get it that women are the ones being pursued, and therefore they have to figure out a way to let the guy down easy.  I told her that we didn’t seem to click, and that things would never work out for us, because I had never been ghosting by someone while I was still on a date with them.

Written for Stine Writing – Poetry, Positivity, and Connecting!, Simply 6 Minutes hosted by Christine Bialczak.

Painted Outfits

I designed these awesome costumes for these three girls to wear, but they only work when they are posed together.  If you ignore their heads and their feet and the pink panties that are sticking out, you will see the face of a tiger with the most haunting green eyes.  I posed them on this area rug, which is a black and white picture of a tiger’s face and lined them up so that the whiskers look like a part of my tiger.  I am studying costume design at the Carnegie Mellon School of Drama in Pittsburgh, and this is my graduate project.  I hope to work on Broadway someday, or possibly make my way to Hollywood.  I better make a lot of money, as the tuition for my Masters in Fine Arts MFA is killing me.

Written for Stine Writing – Poetry, Positivity, and Connecting!, Simply 6 Minutes hosted by Christine Bialczak.