It only takes a little bit of lace to ruin a marriage. My wife was furious when she found these panties in our bed. She held them up and said, “I am willing to listen to what you have to say about this, but it better be good. I want to know if you are cheating on me, or if you have another explanation of how these mystery panties which are clearly not mine ended up in our bed. I understand that every case of infidelity is different and it’s important not to judge without hearing someone’s story. There are only three reasons why a girl might leave a lacy memento behind and either she couldn’t find them when she left, or she’s claiming you as hers, or she’s giving you a sexy souvenir to remind you of that hot night. Tell me the real story.”
I replied, “Oops, I cheated. I really didn’t really mean to, but the opportunity was there and I couldn’t resist, it sort of just happened. I am sorry that you found that, but ever since the intimacy disappeared in our marriage and you lost interest in having sex, well I have needs, but I still love you. I never meant to cause you any pain, but I am actually glad that you found out, as I felt terrible keeping things from you. I made a conscious choice and there is nobody to blame but me, but it seemed like you were turned off to me and when the opportunity for me to be unfaithful arrived, I figured that since I was unsatisfied with the way our marriage was going, I was going to do it. I hope that you are satisfied with my answer.”
My wife said, “Of course I am not satisfied, as you left out all of the details, and you never told me how the panties ended up in our bed. I would like to know who the panties belong to, was it a one-time thing, or are you seeing this woman on a steady basis. Why would you have sex with this woman in our bed, like couldn’t you go to a hotel, or do it at her place? What would our neighbors think if they see you sneaking this woman into our house, when I am not home? I understand that you have needs and that I have been ignoring them, but you must be more discrete about your affairs, as I don’t want to become a laughing stock. You are free to do whatever you like with your mistresses, as I don’t need your loving and I lost that loving feeling a long time ago. I still love you and I don’t mind giving you a kiss on the lips, as that makes me feel sexy, but that is as far as I want to go. As far as I am concerned, adultery is not a deal breaker, so tell me everything that happened.”
I said, “It started out innocently enough with a woman named Cindy at work when we were assigned to work on the same project and those are her panties that you found. She is married and she caught her husband wearing her panties one day at her house and since then she has been viewing him as a sissy. They have been married for ten years and he wanted her to participate in his kinky fetishes, but she said that is not her style. She broke down crying one night over dinner when we were on a road trip, telling me all about her problems. I figured that it was only fair if I shared some personal details of our relationship with her and I told her how you have lost interest in having sex, not that the sex we had was ever that good in the first place. I told her how you never liked me to see you naked and that you would only pull your panties off under the covers. She thought that was weird and said that I was missing out on the best part of sex. After a few drinks at dinner, I walked Cindy back to her hotel room and she invited me in, and I mean like she really invited me all the way in. It is not a one-time thing as we have been doing it for several months and the sex is awesome. On my last trip, I told Cindy that I left some papers at our house and said that I needed to get then for the meeting and she came inside with me and one thing le\ad to another and we ended up in bed. I can’t explain why she left her panties behind, but if you like, I can call her and ask her.”
My wife said, “Yes please give her a call and ask her to come over for dinner and tell her to bring her panty wearing husband with her, as that is turning me on.”
Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie First Line Friday hosted by Dylan.