On Top of Spaghetti

Dawn said, “Hey mister, did you see my poor meatball, as I seem to have lost it when somebody sneezed?  Is there any chance that it rolled down this sewer where you are living in?  Why are you down there anyway?  Are there a lot of rats down there?  What is it like to live in a sewer?  Anyway, I was just checking about my meatball, it is not like I was going to eat it any more if it went down the sewer.  I guess I should look someplace else.”  The monster in the sewer said. “You need to think, what your family would say if they knew that you were talking to a strange man that lives in the sewer.  Stop worrying about your meatball rolling away and think what the future would be like if you were eating your dinner in the sewer with a monster like me.  Take this red balloon and go away Dawn, I don’t have your meatball.”

Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie NEKNEERAJ’s Photo Challenge #297.

How Weird is That

My wife gave me a new watch for Christmas and I am still learning how to use it.  I think that she saw me looking at it in my Diving magazine.  I got the Fossil Garrett Chronograph watch which is a 3-hand analog movement device, which also has a date indicator and some various extra features that go beyond just telling time and also make it look cool.  Many people are mystified by all the dials, but being a chronograph watch simply means that the timepiece can be used as a stopwatch to measure elapsed time.  It is multifunctional as in addition to its standard display capabilities, it incorporates three separate dials usually for hours, minutes and seconds, but I have the 1/20 second model, making it able to divide time into smaller increments down to five one hundredths or one twentieth of a second.  It contains 3 pusher buttons, that start, stop and reset the timer.  My new watch has a depth rating of 20 ATM, 20 BAR, 200 Meters, so it is splash resistant for hand washing, submersible for swimming, incorporates the ability to be used for shallow diving in case I go snorkeling and I can also wear it if I want to go scuba diving, but it cannot withstand deep sea pressures.

My wife has this uncanny ability to say things which are often repeated on TV seconds after and this is similar to the Baader-Meinhof (pronounced badder mainhoff) phenomenon.  This phenomenon occurs when the thing you’ve just noticed, experienced or been told about suddenly crops up constantly.  This happens when a person stumbles upon some obscure piece of information, that is often an unfamiliar word or name, and soon afterwards they encounter the same word or subject again, and it keeps on repeating.  The phenomenon which is also known as the frequency illusion or recency illusion, bears some similarity to synchronicity, which is the experience of having a highly meaningful coincidence, such as having someone telephone you while you are thinking about them.  When we are watching TV together, we encounter this phenomenon with such regularity that we actually anticipate it happening and I say, “You did it again”.  I wonder if destiny is calling for these events to happen, but then I realize that the human brain is always searching for patterns.

When I consider how much my wife talks, it does not seem all that odd, as she has diarrhea of the mouth and I think that she must be in love with the sound of her own voice as she is constantly blabbering about something.  Over the years I have learned how to tune her out, otherwise I would have gone crazy by now.  This watch that I just got kept popping up in TV commercials just before Christmas and my wife asked me if that was the same model that I was looking at in my Diving magazine.  I had never heard of this watch before, but suddenly it seemed to be everywhere.  My brother told me that he just got one.  I saw two guys in my office that also just got the exact same watch, and I started wondering why this was happening.  Was this watch suddenly starting to dominate the thoughts of everyone on the planet, or was my consciousness playing tricks on me?  My life seemed to be surrounded by this watch and it was coming out of nowhere.  A fair warning to all of my readers, don’t be surprised if the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon starts to crop up everywhere you turn.

Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie NEKNEERAJ’s Photo Challenge #296.

Tree of Life

Along with the forbidden Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, this Tree of Life was the other special tree in the Garden of Eden.  God allowed Adam and Eve to eat from any tree in the garden, except the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, as He indicated that would cause their death.  After they sinned, God sentenced them to die, and He forbid them to take from the Tree of Life.  God banished them from the garden and the Tree of Life remained there along with its healing properties that would allow humans to live forever.  God stationed cherubim and a fiery revolving sword to guard the way to the Tree of Life.

The Earth was in peril after the nuclear disaster and God sent 18 birds to retrieve the Tree of Life, which had been relocated to a secret place during the flood of Noah.  The birds were taking the tree to the Vatican, so it could be transplanted there.  God wanted there to be peace on Earth this day, as it was the celebration of the birthday of His son Jesus.  God felt that this would provide the spark of hope that humanity clearly needed now, so people could live in harmony with each other.  God desires that all men and nations live in peace, be friendly with each other, and feel free from being attacked in their lives, so they can rest and be content.

Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie NEKNEERAJ’s Photo Challenge #295.

Duma Road Caribou Crossing

Watching the movements and migrations of the massive Western Arctic caribou herd, I was amazed as I saw the caribou approach the red light and many of them would stop and then wait for it to turn green.  It was an audio-visual traffic light, which made sounds of birds chirping when it turned yellow and bells rang the entire time it was red.  Not everyone of them would stop, but about three quarters of the caribou that encountered the red light did stop and wait for it to turn green, causing them to delay their walk south.  Some caribou would totally ignore it, like it didn’t exist and it was none of their concern, some would walk right up to it and they would mill about it, loitering for a while, wandering aimlessly about, or just wasting their time idly there, but some others have turned completely around to walk an extra 100 miles or so away from it.  We had a camera station set up there which gave us good video of their reactions to the light.

It still is not clear what is causing some of the caribou to stop while others keep going, but it is thought that the ones who keep going are trying to avoid parasitic insects which are more abundant on undisturbed tundra.  In order to get the pipeline approved, we had to do an environmental impact study on the caribou migration and this traffic light was set up sort of like a joke, just to see what the caribou would do.  This caribou crossing has provided us valuable information on the herd and their twice-yearly migration.  Right now, we are deciding on whether or not it would be better to install a bridge over the pipeline or a tunnel under it for the caribou to cross.  Global warming is diminishing the heard, the effects of warmer winters are inescapable, from the early breakup of sea ice to the changing migratory patterns of caribou and other mammals.

Man is their greatest enemy, but wolves are their biggest predator.  Out in the open the caribou can easily out run a wolf, but if a wolf is able to hide, then they can sneak up on the caribou and make a meal out of it.  The bridge would give the wolves less of a chance to hide than the tunnel, but we are not sure if the caribou would go over the bridge.  Caribou has a gamey taste, but if it is seasoned, it can make a nice stew.  There is nothing better for being out in the cold than wearing a jacket made out of caribou hide.

Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie NEKNEERAJ’s Photo Challenge #294.

Glorified Paperweight

I had high hopes for my solar energy generation steam distribution system that consisted of vast fields of mirrors to concentrate incoming sunlight to heat up water working in conjunction with a conglomeration of pipework to transfer the resulting steam and produce clean energy.  It actually worked rather well generating the right quality and proper pressure, but I never considered corrosion to be a factor.  The high temperatures and low pH values running through my copper pipes started to degrade into copper ions, which then dissolved into the condensate and this accumulated as solid build-up, clogging my lines.  I should have gone with the stainless-steel design, well live and learn.

Corrosion is the deterioration of a substance or its properties due to a reaction with its environment and in this case, the metal on the interior of the piping was dissolving, causing pipe failure that started to leak and some of the pipes even burst.  I got tired of repairing all the pipes, replacing entire sections of pipe that began to leak, or removing every fitting where the green discolorations appeared.  Since the piping no longer worked and I was still proud of my design, I modified it by attaching a lamp to the top of it and this useless piece of junk actually makes an effective paperweight.  It is a good thing that my design of the Obama Pajama worked out for me.

Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie NEKNEERAJ’s Photo Challenge #291.

Navajo Night Chant

Her Navajo name is Yanaha which means Brave and that is very appropriate, as no one had ever attempted to do the Night Chant at the top of Flat Rock before.  This is the most sacred of all Navajo dances and one of the most difficult and demanding to learn, involving intricate coordination and balance and she was going to do it in her spike heels.  The Night Chant is basically a healing ritual, designed both to cure people who are sick and to restore the order and balance of human relationships within the Navajo universe.  If she pulls it off, sickness will be warded off from her people for another year.  Before the chant takes place, she will be stripped of all of her clothing, except her savage pantyhose and her shoes and then she will be struck with a yucca whip, while the others in the tribe touch her body with ears of corn covered with sprays of spruce.  She will be sporting two feathers in her hair and her spirit guide the crow will stay with her.

A big crowd is expected to gather once the fires are lit to take the chill out of the night air.  She will call out the names of the four gods, while she rhythmically moves back and forth, hooting at the moon god for his approval, which usually has a hypnotic effect on the listeners.  This night will be all about Yanaha, as she had been an apprentice for many years and she knows every step of this elaborate ritual.  As the ceremony drags on through the night, there will be much eating and even more drinking and there will most likely be one or two bowls being passed around of some good smoke.  A spirit of good will and hospitality will pervade the atmosphere, old grudges and feuds will be forgotten as the people come together to share the blessing of the gods.

Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie NEKNEERAJ’s Photo Challenge #290.

Balloon Art Convention

There is going to be a whole lot of balloon twisting and shaping going on this weekend at the Lanesborough London five-star hotel in Hyde Park this weekend, and we are likely to see all types of balloon animals.  The hotel features a vibrant night life bar, a magnificent club & spa, free WiFi and it has 24-hour butler service.  I booked us a luxurious suite and made reservations at the Michelin-starred Céleste restaurant, where I am going to order the beef Wellington.  I know that most people see balloon art as being squeaky and irritating, but I have been a balloon twister bending different shapes and creating my own special art my whole life.

The world of balloon art provides entertainment for parties and special events, but right now it is growing rapidly and I plan to make it pop as I take this to a whole new level with the only limit being the extent of my imagination.  I want to win first prize and get to drive home that new pink car that is parked out front.  Tomorrow I will create a giant love boat balloon and a tunnel of love balloon canal for it to sail down, using 250 balloons sculpted together.  The other balloon artists are welcome to place their balloon art in my tunnel of love and I hope it will be lined with dogs, rabbits, giraffes, monkeys and a moose or two.

Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie NEKNEERAJ’s Photo Challenge #285.