Pat on the Back

I think that most people will look for physical beauty first, but it is probably easier for a man to be accepted if he is not that good looking, because women have a way of looking beyond beauty.  Most men are visual creatures as our brains are wired differently from a woman’s.  Men are consumed with desire, so looking at a beautiful woman turns us on, allowing us to ignore almost everything else in order to be with an attractive woman.  I don’t get many compliments on my looks, and I don’t consider myself to be attractive.  Since beauty is in the eye of the beholder, it is possible that someone else might think of me as being attractive.  If it comes down to beauty or brains, I would rather the person that is giving me a compliment just be honest with me.

Appearance counts, but so does creativity, passion and character.  Beauty is only skin deep, so this would be a superficial compliment and it would not account for the person who you are on the inside and beauty can fade over time.  I guess it is also possible for a person to lose their intelligence, as they get older and that is why I keep blogging as I feel it keeps my mind sharp.  I would always take a compliment, but I think it would be more sincere if it was about my intelligence, rather than on my looks.  If a woman ever told me that I was the best lover that she ever had, I would know that she is lying to me, but so far that has never happened.  I think the thing that would impress me the most is if somebody thought I was attractive for my honesty.

Written for Sadje’s Sunday Poser #96, where she asks us, “What is the first thing you would like people to notice or compliment you upon?  Looks or intelligence?”

16 thoughts on “Pat on the Back

  1. Men or women, both do value if complimented on their talents or intelligence. Saying someone is beautiful or handsome is I think an empty platitude. ( I think) Thanks for sharing your thoughts

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  2. I’ve known plain people who look beautiful because of their personality…and I’ve seen beautiful people look downright ugly because of their personalities.

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      1. I’ve seen it brighten up a smile that makes a big difference. You are right…men on the whole are more shallow when it comes to looks.

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  3. In a man, of course there has to be chemistry, so you do start by good looks. But to carry those good looks, I personally find talent very attractive, which is why I married a musician/artist. Then a close second is depth and spiritually. Third comes humor. My husband and I laugh so much, I actually get pains in my stomach!!

    When I was single, I’ve been approached by very handsome men who I walked away from when they were in mid-sentence because they were so boring! Why waste time? Ha-ha!

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  4. My last date didn’t last long. I met a woman in a pub and we ended up going back to her place. After a few more drinks, we started kissing and having a bit of foreplay on the sofa. She looked at me and said, “Let’s take this upstairs.”
    I said, “Okay, you grab one end and I’ll grab the other.”.

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