Love Fades

We have been married for 40 years and over time, the spark has faded, leading to a decreased romantic attraction between us.  We still love each other, but time has a way of tearing things apart and it has taken a toll on our marriage.  We are companions for life, but we don’t make passionate love anymore.  I am satisfied with my life, and I don’t want to meet any new people, or flirt with anyone, and I could never think about dating someone else.  We hold hands and hug each other and there may be an occasional kiss exchanged between us but being with the same person every day removes the mystery of the unknown, which takes away the excitement for intimacy.  There are many things that I don’t do anymore that I did when I was young, and it is just not possible to maintain the emotional excitement of romance that I once felt for being in love.

I took her on a cruise this spring to the Caribbean and we visited a very romantic island, but the whole time I was there, I was worried about getting Covid.  The other day she complained that don’t bring her flowers anymore and I guess she has a point, but have you seen the cost of roses lately?  She said that we hardly talk to each other, and she wanted me to sing love songs to her like I used to.  I remember there was a time when I came home from work and I walked through the door, that I couldn’t wait to make love with her, and I used to hate to leave her.  Now in the rare occasions that we do make love, when I am done, I just turn out the light and roll over and go to sleep.  It used to be so natural for us to talk about everything all night long and share all our thoughts with each other.  The other day I saw this work of art, so I purchased it for her, hoping this would keep her from saying that I don’t bring her flowers anymore.  I realize that it would have been better if the artist used my arms in the artwork instead of a female’s arms, but mine are all hairy and these look a lot better.

Written for Sadje at Keep It Alive What Do You See #145, where the Image credit comes from Marti Alonso @ Unsplash.

13 thoughts on “Love Fades

      1. That’s not the way to think about it. A gift is an acknowledgement of shared moments. Appreciation of understanding. A demonstration of affection. We all need those things.

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  1. It’s not the love that fades, it’s the provision of a caring heart, or holding onto unrealistic expectations – both ways.
    Love and understanding grow with time when tended like a seasonal garden. A bit of time given to the necessary things, a lot of time to communicating, and a regular dose of smiles and physical touches.

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