My parents got married on February 2, 1951 and they flew down to Miami to be on the beach and see the palm trees for their honeymoon. I am sure that they kept to themselves being newlyweds, but one evening they went out to a night club. There was a comedian entertaining the customers and he asked the audience if there was anyone out there who was on their honeymoon. My mom nudged my dad and told him to stand up and he said “No, if I do that this guy will just make a jerk out of me.” My mom was always kind of thrifty and she told my dad that if he stood up that they would probably be given some nice gift, so my dad reluctantly stood up. The comedian spotted my dad standing up and asked him to come up on the stage, where he shook my dad’s hand congratulated him on his marriage and then told this joke.
He said, “I think that I passed you and your lovely wife in the hallway upstairs when you first checked into the hotel, but you were both so eager to reach your honeymoon suite and consummate your marriage that you didn’t notice me. I stood outside your room and I heard you taking your pants off and then you threw them at the feet of your bride and you said, ‘Put those on.’ Your bride sounded perplexed, but she attempted to do as you asked. I heard her say, ‘They’re too big, they won’t stay on.’ You answered her, ‘That’s right, just remember who wears the pants in this family.’ I figured that you had settled things and I was about to leave when I heard her tell you, ‘Put those on.’ This made me laugh especially when you said, ‘I can’t get into them.’ The last thing that I heard was her telling you, ‘That’s right and until your attitude changes that’s the way it’s going to be.’ My dad was completely embarrassed and utterly humiliated, but the comedian gave him a nice bottle of champagne called lavender moon.
My mom was really happy and they brought this special bottle of champagne back with them from Miami and decided to save it for their 25th wedding anniversary. We moved a lot and this bottle kept getting tossed into closet after closet for 25 years, till they finally opened it up. The sad news is that because it was not stored properly, the champagne turned into vinegar and nobody got to drink it, but the comedian was right as most of the time my mom wore the pants and my dad did what she told him.
Written for Paula’s Paint Chip Friday challenge #4 where today we are supposed to derive inspiration from Valspar’s “lavender moon” and/or “twilight mist.”