Procedure

This is not a story about regretting something that I should have said, in fact it is the opposite.  This is about something that I said and I regretted saying it, the second the words left my mouth.  I had these skin tags and my doctor had this cattle prod like device which she used to burn them off of me.  I only went to see her when they were bothering me, as my clothes would rub against them and they would become irritating.  She told me that when she was in college that she and her roommate would always remove skin tags from each other.  She removed some from my chest and then asked me if any others were bothering me.

I told her that I had a few in my groin area that were annoying me and I asked her if she could take a look at them.  She told me to get undressed and she handed me a cloth to cover my groin, as she left the room.  I stripped my shorts and underwear off and got back on the examination table and covered my genital area with the cloth.  She knocked on the door and I told her to come back in.  She got right to work saying that one of them did look painful and she would take care of it.  I pointed at several others and she said that she would get all of them for me.  Her hand slipped while she was removing one of them which caused the back of her hand to brush against my scrotum and she immediately apologized to me.

I told her it was OK and it was not unpleasant.  I couldn’t believe what I had just said to her, as thoughts raced through my mind that if it wasn’t unpleasant that I was saying it was pleasant.  I didn’t mean for it to come out that way and I started blushing and then as if I had no control over myself, I started growing bigger and that caused the cloth to fall off.  She smiled at me and said that she would be right back.  She had one of her nurses come back in with her and she told her nurse to hold the cloth in place, so she could finish up her work.  The nurse was very cooperative and didn’t seem to mind lending a helping hand and I am sure that it was just a part of another routine medical procedure for her.  It was a bit embarrassing for me, but I was happy to get rid of those skin tags.  For many years after the event, I kept going over in my head, why I had said it was not unpleasant.  If I would have just said, it did not hurt and I am OK, that would have saved me a lot of embarrassment, but then the nurse would have missed out on her opportunity to be involved in my procedure.

Written for the Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie Sunday Writing Prompt which is hosted by Sara from relaxitsallwrite which today is Speak Now, or Forever Hold Your Peace.

20 thoughts on “Procedure

  1. What a great story! You’ve certainly had a lot of adventures! IMO, “not unpleasant” was probably the best phrase you could’ve used. It let the nurse know that you were a gentleman, rather than saying “Oh boy! Do it again, please?” Or anything else you might’ve said.

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  2. Eh. MOST doctors are apparently immune to sexual innuendo or situations while they’re working. I’m sure it was more embarrassing for you than for her. That’s one reason that I like having female doctors over male ones, although I’m sure looking at me wouldn’t send even the most lustful doctor into a frenzy. I was raised to be fairly modest, and undressing in front of others, save for my husband and FWB over the years, would embarrass me greatly. After having had two hip replacements and one knee so far, I’ve been mostly cured of that. I don’t have anything they haven’t seen before.

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    1. I had a disturbing experience at a hair salon, when the stylist who was a guy started rubbing the back of my neck and I got creeped out, so I only let women touch me now.

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  3. Great twist of the prompt! Enjoyed your direction, although it caused you embarrassment. I’m sure the nurse did not take it the way you were concerned about. They seem to be desensitized to most things, and have compassion and understanding for off-the-cuff remarks when a patient is in an uncomfortable situation.

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