Igor said, “That is such a grotesque travesty and beyond disturbing for you to be transforming plants into humans, sculpting their roots to look like faces is just not natural. You are one crafty thief to mock the poor people who are fascinated with your humanoid root abominations that they will spend their good money to purchase something that you made from pruning roots and passing it off as being genuine. No one will believe that these devil roots sprang from the dripping blood of a hanged man and that when the moon is full that they may let out a monstrous scream.”
Doctor Moreau said, “I do feel a bit unscrupulous about this, but it is harmless fun and nobody is forcing anybody to buy these plants. The marketing firm came up with the name devil roots, the dripping blood and the idea that they might scream when the moon is full, but whether or not people actually believe this nonsense is not important, as they are selling like hot cakes. I told the New Way Marketing Company that the plant roots look more like they are singing than they look like they are screaming out with pain, so they came up with a new scheme. They are going to market groups of six plants which they call the Purple Gang, an ensemble that when purchased together will supply rhythm rather than harmony or melody and they may break out into singing ‘Jail House Rock’ occasionally. People really seem to like them and I got tired of trimming my bonsai trees, so I moved on to this new creation.” Igor said, “Maybe instead of going with an Elvis song, you should try ‘Mean Green Mother From Outer Space’ from Little Shop of Horrors.
Written for Fandango’s Flash Fiction Challenge #65.