Come See My Etchings

Back in the 60s, this was the line I used to seduce innocent young girls to get them into my room, so they would feel that it was proper to be alone with me.  After a night of shared passion, one girl actually asked me where my etchings were, which puzzled me as every other girl knew exactly what my intentions were.  I was in trouble, as I had no scintilla of artistic talent, so I showed her a picture of a flowerbed that my 8 year old niece drew.  She said that it was nothing more than masterful scribblings, and she did not consider it to be art.  I came clean with her and told her that I was a busboy and not an artist and that I only lied to show her that I had a sense of humor.

She told me that she was a lawyer and that she could sue me for false pretenses, because I misrepresented myself.  I told her that I had never gotten any complaints before from any of the other women who I lured up to my room to have sex with and I told her that it looked like she needed to unwind and said that I could rub her back for her.  She said that she wasn’t having any of that and she wasn’t about to be duped again.  I inquired about the trip or flight that she mentioned that she was taking and said that I could give her a pre-travel massage to help to loosen up and relax her muscles, as well as increase her circulation.  She reluctantly agreed and when I started taking my clothes off she told me that I should go on a diet.  I asked her if she wanted me to massage her breasts and she said fine, but don’t forget my beaver.  I told her no problem and said that I was happy that the beaver population was coming back in Maryland.

Written for Roger Shipp’s Daily Addictions prompt – Trouble, for the Daily Spur prompt – Trip, for FOWC with Fandango – Diet, for August Monthly Writing Prompts – Masterful scribblings, for Ragtag Community – Scintilla, for Sara’s Closet Full Of Notebooks Prompt – Sense of Humor, for Paula’s Three Things Challenge prompt words – Busboy Flowerbed Maryland, for GC and Sue W Weekly Prompts – Unwind and for Word of the Day Challenge Prompt – Flight.