Testify On My Own Behalf

When I was young, I was a bit wild, as I used to smoke weed and drink alcohol while I was driving.  The first night I got my Learners Permit my Dad let me borrow his car.  I went out with the VW and 4 of my friends and we picked up some beer and smoked a bunch of joints.  I got out on the highway and it started raining and I had to learn how to steer by using my thighs on the wheel, otherwise I would not have been able to take any hits or enjoy my beer.  The stick shift made it all the more difficult and this particular highway had traffic lights, so I was really building up my confidence, testing out the waters if not being thrown into the fire.

I ended up getting a lot of tickets for things like speeding, careless driving, reckless driving, failure to yield, running a stop light, drag racing and other things.  When I got 21 points on my license, I had to go to driving school run by the State Troopers.  I passed the course and I was allowed to keep my driving privileges, but I was put on a probation that stated I could not get any more tickets for a year, otherwise my license would be suspended.  I had this job working second shift and one night I got pulled over on my way home and I was issued a ticket for failure to make a full stop at a Stop Sign.

My friend talked me into seeing this lawyer that his Dad knew, so I made an appointment with him and asked him if he would represent me in court.  I told him what happened and he said that I didn’t need a lawyer and I could just represent myself.  Great I was saving money!  On the day of my court hearing, Officer M. testified first, stating the time of the incident, the road conditions, saying that I pulled right out in front of him and how long he followed me before pulling me over.  The judge asked if there was any other testimony.  I told him, “That is now what happened your honor.”  The judge told me to come forward and give my testimony and I said, “If Officer M. says that pulled right out in front of him, then he must have been driving with his headlights off.”  Courtroom breaks out in laughter and judge slams his gavel down and says, “Continue.”  I said, “I made a full stop and looked both ways and when I saw nothing coming, I made a right turn.”  The judge said, “In light of this testimony, case dismissed.”

Written for Linda G. Hill’s ‘Life in progress’ JusJoJan January twenty-eighth prompt suggested by Dan No Facilities and that prompt is “Testify”.

10 thoughts on “Testify On My Own Behalf

  1. Glad the judge believed you…
    I remember when I was young…I went to a bar had to keep one eye shut all the way home because I was seeing double. That ended that behavior. It was the only time I ever did it… and the last.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. It is a good thing that the courtroom laughed at what I said and I had heard other people say that several cops were driving without their headlights on so they would not be noticed. In these days there were no cars that had the headlights come on automatically.

      Liked by 1 person

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