Why Is Being Short Bad?

Nothing is more powerful than belief.  I said to my new friend, “It is not the end of the world, hey life is not going to be all that great for you with those big ears, those little stubby arms, those small legs and those big feet, but things could be much worse, as at least you are symmetrical.  Maybe you could get some platform shoes for those little baby legs, so you wouldn’t have to stand so low?”  I had just taken a hit of Orange Sunshine and I did not feel like doing any work tonight.  This was the first time that I dropped acid at work and I knew that Orange Sunshine was the best, most pure, highest-quality acid ever produced and this was the first time that I ever took it.  I had smoked some weed laced with angle dust or PCP, done magic mushrooms, chocolate mescaline, peyote buttons, Purple Haze, microdot and blotter acid, so I did not see a problem handling just one tiny hit.

I dropped the hit of Orange Sunshine on the way to work on the back of a motor cycle, as my friend who was giving me a ride in that night said he was doing some.  I worked in the plumbing department at a large warehouse, where I was given a list of items that needed to go on certain trucks.  I usually had about a dozen orders to fill every night, which involved pulling the items out of bins, loading them of the wagon, checking off the ticket and then pushing the wagon down to the shipping dock.  I finished two tickets when the Sunshine kicked in, so I sat on the bench and found that changes in my perception of reality had began.  I took out my magic marker and the ink just flowed out onto the cardboard box, making this funny image.  All of a sudden this strange figure jumped off the box and started talking to me and it said, “It looks like you could use some help.”

I needed help alright as I knew that I was seeing things that couldn’t possibly be there, but I went along with it and said, “Yes, you are kind of short, but you look like a great climber, so I wonder if you can you pull all of my freight for me while I sit here and mark up all the tickets as being complete?”  Off it went down the aisle saying peep, peep, peep as it gathered the items from the bins that I called out.  My ink blot dude had finished off four more tickets for me and it was time for lunch.  My friend worked in a different department and at lunch he came down to see me and ask how I was doing and I told him about my new friend and how I was getting all of my work done.  He said, “Dude you are way to high to be at work, I am going to take you home and tell your boss that you got sick.”  I had him drop me at a park where a lot of my friends hung out.  I had this plumbing fitting in my pocket, which made everything look real psychedelic, but I was a bit sad because I knew that I would never see my short inkblot friend again.

Short people got no reason
Short people got no reason
Short people got no reason
To live

They got little hands
And little eyes
And they walk around
Tellin’ great big lies
They got little noses
And tiny little teeth
They wear platform shoes
On their nasty little feet

Well, I don’t want no short people
Don’t want no short people
Don’t want no short people
Round here

Short people are just the same
As you and I
(A fool such as I)
All men are brothers
Until the day they die
(It’s a wonderful world)

Short people got nobody
Short people got nobody
Short people got nobody
To love

They got little baby legs
And they stand so low
You got to pick ‘em up
Just to…

They got little baby legs
And they stand so low
You got to pick ‘em up
Just to say hello
They got little cars
That got beep, beep, beep
They got little voices
Goin’ peep, peep, peep
They got grubby little fingers
And dirty little minds
They’re gonna get you every time
Well, I don’t want no short people
Don’t want no short people
Don’t want no short people
‘Round here

Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie Sunday Writing Prompt “Rorschach Test 3”.

5 thoughts on “Why Is Being Short Bad?

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