Why Would You Hand Me A Saw?

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A freaking saw, WTF is wrong with you.  I am hanging on to this branch in a life and death situation and you try to hand me a saw.  You must be brain damaged as all this saw can do is make me fall to my death!  You should have brought me some rope or a ladder or maybe even a parachute.  I heard that when you were up in heaven and God asked you if you wanted a brain, you thought that He said pain, so you replied ‘No Thanks’.  You are as dumb as a box of rocks and you might even be as dumb as a bag of hammers and I think that you could be easily outwitted by a turnip.  Your mom must have dropped you on your head and I think that your family tree must be a cactus, because you certainly are a prick.  You are living proof that God makes mistakes.  You were probably born on a highway, because that’s where most accidents happen.  Calling you an idiot is an insult to all the stupid people.

Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie Tale Weaver – #174 – Making Sense of Nonsense

12 thoughts on “Why Would You Hand Me A Saw?”

    1. I never heard the expression mad as a box of frogs before, but it sort of makes sense as frogs like to jump and they would have a hard time doing that if they were stuck in a box and thus driving them mad.

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