Mr. Jones from the pastry shop next door walked in carrying a box of doughnuts and he said, “I brought these for you to welcome you to the neighborhood. I just baked them and I hope that you will devour them. I saw your sign out front ‘Alleviate SC’ and I was wondering if you are from South Carolina.” Carla behind the counter took the doughnuts and she thanked Mr. Jones for bringing them and then she introduced herself. Carla then said that SC is an abbreviation for Sex Clinic, not South Carolina.
Mr. Jones remarked that he had never been in a sex clinic before and he said that he had no idea what would go on in an establishment like this. He then made a comment about the lovely fragrance that he was inhaling. Carla told him that he was smelling white sweet clover and that is used to provide stress relief and also to stimulate the patients. Carla explained that Alleviate SC was a medical facility that could help people with various problems that they may be encountering in their bedrooms.
Carla asked Mr. Jones if he would like a tour and he said that he did have a few minutes of free time, but because he was a self possessed person, that he did not like to deviate too much from his normal routine. Carla informed him that the flower shop that was previously here had left copious amounts of pollen in the air and that she had to have a new exhaust system installed because of that. Mr. Jones gasped as he walked past a poster that featured men and women engaged in various sexual acts and Carla enlightened him that as one might expect they do teach a lot more than the conventional position here.
Carla informed Mr. Jones that many sexual dysfunctions can be treated with pills, but since sex is tied in with an individual’s mental state that they often animate allusions for their male patients to help them sprout an errection. Carla said that she hoped to get some female patients as well, specifically ones that are tired of remaining chaste and no longer want to live their lives acting like a timid fawn.
Carla said that she had twenty years of experience treating couples with bedroom problems and that she had developed many elaborate scenarios and the one that she was most proud of because it always seemed to work was when the man pretends that he has been paid a dowry to be with the woman. Mr. Jones asked Carla what those long rubber gloves were used for and she replied that they were needed during electric nipple stimulation to prevent shocks from being able to arc back.
Written for Mindlovemisery’s Menagerie Wordle #177.